


Mrig Trishna

by Dwij008



Category: Mahabharata - Vyasa
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-27
Updated: 2018-10-11
Packaged: 2019-07-18 06:04:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,593
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16112378
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dwij008/pseuds/Dwij008
Summary: Was she in love with her husband's mortal enemy? She couldn't say. But there was one thing she knew without doubt, the world seemed like a much brighter place when he smiled at her.





	1. Reopened

"Om Shanti Shanti Shanti..." Her mother-in-law chanted. "Om Shanti.. Sh.." "Shanti? There can be no Shanti now." A sardonic voice interrupted. Shrutikanti turned to look at her husband. "What is wrong my Lord?" Vrushali, her elder co-wife asked. "Do you not know? The Pandavas yet live. After many years Duryodhana had found some happiness only to know it was a lie. " He said even as he bent to take his mother's blessings. 'How wise is it to find happiness in death?' Shruti thought but didn't dare voice her thoughts. "The Pandavas aren't your enemies son." Radha stroked her son's head. Shruti thought it was a fruitless endeavor. Karna's hatred for the Pandavas, especially Arjuna, was too rooted in his heart. "We have been summoned to Hastinapura to welcome them." Karna said ignoring his mother's words. "Prepare yourselves." The last words were directed at her and Vrushali. "Vrishasena is too young for the journey and I cannot leave him." Vrushali was quick with her excuse. Karna turned to Shruti. "We leave at dawn tomorrow." He left without waiting for her answer. "He has been like this ever since he returned from Panchala. I wish he had never met that wretched Duryodhan." Radha lamented as usual. "By your leave, Ma. I must go prepare myself for the journey." Shruti customarily bent to touch her mother-in-law's feet. "Yes of course my dear. Give your parents our regards." Radha blessed her daughter-in-law. With a nod and a smile at Vrushali she left for her chambers. 

It was only when she reached the sanctuary of her own room that she allowed her emotions to surface. She did not know what she truly felt. Was it dread or excitement? Perhaps a dreadful excitement. All she knew was that she was going to see him again. The one with honey colored eyes and honeyed words. The one whose laughter had been music to her ears and whose music had been a balm to her heart. She knew her thoughts were akin to sacrilege. Yet she couldn't remove him from her mind or heart. Was she in love with her husband's mortal enemy? She couldn't say. But there was one thing she had known without doubt from the moment she had met Arjuna. The world seemed like a much brighter place when he smiled at her. 

Shrutikanti closed her eyes as she felt her husband stir beside her. It would not be well for him to know she hadn't slept a wink last night. She felt a light touch on her shoulder. "Shruti." Karna whispered. "We must leave at the earliest." She turned, opening her eyes to see his handsome visage. "It pains me to inconvenience you. But it is important that you accompany me." There was such tenderness in his eyes. 'He doesn't deserve this' she thought as she swallowed the lump in her throat. Her Husband wasn't a bad person. He was handsome, strong, generous and just. But his hatred for Arjuna twisted and hardened his heart in ways that made him unrecognizable. Somehow Karna had decided that Arjuna was the one responsible for all the scorn and insult that society heaped on him from the day of the rangbhoomi event. In truth it was Kripacharya who had brought up Karna's Kula and Bheema who had insulted him. The only thing Arjuna had done was respond to his threats. Shrutikanti sighed, feeling another wave of guilt. She shouldn't be defending her husband's enemy, even in her own mind. Yet she couldn't change her feelings for Arjuna any more than her husband could. "Shubhage... What is wrong?" It seemed her husband was in a particularly loving mood that morning. He rarely used endearments. "Nothing, Aryaputra." She sat up. "I was wondering if we'll stay at my Father's house this time." She lied. "Believe me, I would like that very much. But I need to be with Duryodhana. He would be in dire need of a friend..." He sounded regretful. "Do not worry. Father knows how much the Yuvraj values you. He wouldn't mind." She tried to smile. "It is not your father but you I'm worried about Priye." He kissed her brow. "But we must make haste. It would not bode well to keep my friend waiting."

It was only later as she comfortably lounged inside the carraige with Karna dozing beside her that she allowed her mind to wander to the past. 

Her father was a merchant who traded in metals. He was one of the chief suppliers of the royal family. It was a co dependant relationship. Her father supplied the metals to the royal forge in return for trading rights and protection all over Kuru Rashtra and many other friendly states. He also needed the King's support to obtain and maintain his position as head of the merchant's guild. The blind king of Hastinapura Dhritrashtra had numerous children. The rumors said that he had as many as a hundred sons. But among the bevy of sons there was only one Daughter, the princess Dushala. Shrutikanti had been playmate to Dushala ever since she could remember. Over time the two had grown into bosom friends. They spent the greater part of the day in each other's company either playing, sharing stories or just talking. If Shrutikanti didn't go to the palace Dushala would herself come to her house demanding why her friend wasn't with her yet. It was on one such day when her maid combing Shruti's hair that Dushala burst into her room. "Shruti!" She panted. "We have new brothers." Shruti couldn't understand why her friend was thrilled at having more brothers when she already had more than she could count and she said as much. "Oh Shruti! You don't understand... They're our cousins and they were born in the forest... And... Oh you must come with me!" Dushala all but dragged Shruti out of the house. "Your highness, please let me finish dressing my lady's hair." The maid pleaded. They had just turned thirteen, the age at which girls begin to care about things like hair, clothes and appearance. But Dushala being Dushala didn't hear a word of what the maid said. Before she knew it Shrutikanti was already inside the royal chariot, loose hair streaming behind her as the horses galloped towards the palace. "Everyone is saying they're the sons of gods." Dushala whispered. "But mother has forbidden me to mention such things especially before my aunt. 'They are your uncle's sons for all intents and purposes'." Dushala imitated her mother's stern voice so perfectly, Shrutikanti couldn't help but laugh. "Laugh all you want now Shruti. I'll see how long you laugh when you see Jyeshth." That was enough to kill Shruti's laughter. Everyone at the palace knew the crown Prince Duryodhan's rage. "But why do these children from the forest provoke him so?" Shruti frowned. "One of them is older than Jyeshth." Shruti understood Immidiately. Duryodhan was so used to being the eldest and lording over everyone, he couldn't bear the idea that there was someone he would have to listen to. 'Hierarchies matter a lot to the Kurus' she remembered her father's words, though she didn't quite understand them. "But that isn't even the biggest problem. The second of the five, Bheem I believe he is called, is incredibly big and raucous. He and Jyeshth clashed immediately. And you wouldn't believe it but he completely thrashed Jyeshth!" Dushala's voice was filled with awe. She had thought her eldest brother the strongest person in the world, the fact that somebody could beat him up was like the sun rising in the west for her. "You said there were five of them. What are the others like?" Shruti asked to divert the topic. She had never been comfortable discussing Dushala's eldest brother. He scared her a little. More than a little, if truth be told. Before Dushala could reply their carraige came to a screening halt. Both the girls frowned. "Do you have no sense boy?!" They heard the charioteer's angry voice. "Do you realise who is inside the carraige? The crown prince will have my head if the princess is hurt!" The two quickly jumped out of their carraige to see what the nuisance was about. The charioteer had a boy by his neck. "What is wrong Shambhu Kaka?" Dushala interrupted the charioteer's tirade. "Nothing my Lady. Somehow this urchin seems to have sneaked into palace grounds and was directly in our way. Do not worry I will immediately hand him over to the guards." The elderly man bowed. "Apologize." He barked as he yanked the boy by his hand. Dushala gasped as the boy came into view. "Shambhu Kaka! Unhand him immidiately." The charioteer looked confused but obeyed. "I apologize brother." Dushala said hesitantly. It was only then that the charioteer realised his mistake. "Your highness." He fell to his knees before the boy. "Forgive me, my lord." The boy looked bewildered. "Why must you apologize? You were absolutely right in admonishing me." His voice held confusion. "But you are a prince. It is not my place to admonish you." The charioteer was still on his knees. "You are my elder. Mother says that one must always listen to one's elders. Please stand up." "I shall never forget your magnamity my lord." The charioteer gushed. "We can walk the rest of the way Shambhu Kaka." Shruti said gently. She had noted the prince's discomfort. Shambhu bowed deeply and left leaving the three alone. There was an awkward pause. "I apologize Sister. I hope you aren't hurt." The boy turned to Dushala. He didn't appear to be much older than them, so he couldn't be the eldest niether was he big enough to thrash Duryodhana, so he must be one of the younger three, Shruti deduced. Dushala only shook her head. The boy smiled as he turned to look at her. Shruti didn't know why her heart was beating so madly or why she was suddenly conscious of her loose hair. "Pranam." He greeted her. "Oh! This is my Sakhi, Shrutikanti." Dushala introduced. Shruti knew she should return his greeting but her tongue felt like lead in her mouth. "I am Arjuna." He gave her another one of his smiles. "I hope he doesn't mention this incident to anyone." He said sheepishly. "Mother warned me not to wander around but I couldn't resist.. exploring." His eyes twinkled mischiveously. "Don't count on it. I wager he's already told half the stables by now about the Prince who doesn't act like a prince." Words tumbled out of her mouth before she could stop them. The boy, no, Arjuna, frowned. "How would a prince act in such a situation?" "He would never let a commoner reprimand him, much less cuff him." Shruti answered. "Even if he's wrong?" "More so." Shruti nodded. "Shouldn't elders be respected?" "Most of the Princes think this rule does not apply to commoners." Shruti explained. Arjuna inclined his head. "I won't be like most princes then." He said thoughtfully. 'You already aren't' Shruti wanted to tell him but held her tongue. She had already spoken too much. "Must we keep conversing in the sun?" Dushala grumbled. Shruti was ashamed to admit that she had completely forgotten about her friend. She had met many boys before but none of them had ever had such an effect on her, she didn't understand why this one did. "Forgive me little sister. I have kept you for too long. It was nice meeting you Shrutikanti." He bowed before going on his way. The rest of the day passed in a daze. More often than not Shruti found her thoughts wandering to a certain curly haired boy with mischievous eyes and an endearing smile. The Prince who didn't quite act like a prince.


	2. Aakarshan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She tried not to notice how he had filled out. His shoulders had become broader, his jaw more square and darker with stubble, yet the smile that he gave her was much the same. And so was the way her stomach fluttered in response.

Over the years Shruti saw much less of Arjuna. Dushala didn't mix much with the boys. They always played rough and more often than not their games ended in brawls. The increasing animosity between the two sets of cousins was quite well known. When Bhima disappeared for some days there were rumors about Duryodhana poisoning him. Even Dushala admitted that it was not entirely implausible. With the arrival of Dronacharya all the princes focused solely on their marital training. Dushala too had begun her training with singing, dancing and all the other arts that were supposed to make a princess eligible. Naturally, Shruti was her companion in all she did. Sometimes they would come across Arjuna on one of his walks in the garden. He was not the scrawny young boy anymore. It was not just her, Dushala’s other companions talked about the princes too and more often than not it was Arjuna they talked and giggled about. She tried not to notice how he had filled out. His shoulders had become broader, his jaw more square and darker with stubble yet the smile that he gave her was much the same. And so was the way her stomach fluttered in response. "Learned to be more princely yet?" She had quipped once when she was feeling particularly brave. "I'm afraid not. I suppose I'll always be the uncouth forest dweller." He chuckled warmly. The sound had evoked sensations in her that she had not even known existed. That night she dreamt of her uncouth forest dweller and the way his calloused hands would feel on her soft skin.  
She was late to rouse the next day. Mortified, she had all but run to her Music lessons with the princess. Her steps faltered at the sound of the Veena being played. And then a man had begun to sing. Shruti's legs seemed to have a mind of their own as they took her nearer to the source of the song that held her in it’s thrall. The man had his back to her, yet she instinctively knew who he was. There was no mistaking those long slender fingers or the bowstring scars on both shoulders. This was preposterous! Was there anything he couldn’t do?! Suddenly he threw his head back and laughed. “There is a lot I cannot do Devi.” He said without turning. Blood drained from Shruti's face. Did she really say that aloud? She fled from the palace before he could say more. Little did she know, it was the last time she would see him up close before the terrible news of his death. 

“How glorious he looks!” “Look at the way he shoots!” “And he can use both hands!” Dushala’s companions whispered excitedly. They were sitting in the stands erected for the royal women. It was the day that marked the completion of the formal education of the Kuru Princes. Their Guru Dronacharya had convinced the King to organize a great event to showcase the abilities of his students. The proud King Dhritrashtra had gladly obliged. Being Dushala’s dearest friend, Shrutikanti along with some others had been invited to the royal enclosure. Her father had only been too glad to have her sitting amongst the exalted ladies of the Kuru household. Yet it was a very different reason that thrilled Shruti's heart. She would finally get to see the skills Arjuna was so famous for. It would be sufficient to say that he did not disappoint. He wielded the bow with a grace that was almost ethereal. The arrows seemed to flow in an endless stream, each finding it's mark with unfailing accuracy. The sun glinted off his silver armor as he made a lap around the arena and when Arjuna removed his helmet to free the mane of dark curly hair, a collective sigh went up from the female half of the audience. He stopped the chariot as he reached the ladies' enclosure and bowed deeply to his mother and aunt. Both the women raised their palms in blessing and Shruti could clearly see the tears of pride on the queen Kunti's face. He gave them one last smile before he mounted the chariot to return to his brothers. Shruti could hardly blame the other girls. He looked like a veritable god basking in the glory that he had strived so hard to achieve. “He smiled at me!” one of them said. “No he smiled at me!” the other argued. Shruti kept quiet. She knew he had smiled at them all. That was just how he was. And then he had been challenged by Vasusena. The drama that had followed had left a bitter taste in Shruti's mind. Many people were swayed to Karna’s side. But Shruti would always remain loyal to the one that held her heart even if he did not know it.

“Impossible!” “Burnt to death you say?” “It is too convenient to be an accident!” Hastinapura was rife with gossip. Only a year ago the Pandavas had left for a much needed reprieve in Varnavarta and suddenly, inexplicably there was news of a great fire. The fire that had taken from Hastinapura it’s beloved Princes and their pious mother. The entire kingdom was in mourning. Some grieved openly while others were more subdued. Shruti wished she could show everyone the true extent of her grief. But it would raise too many questions. Yes, they mourned for their lost princes but she had lost someone far more precious. It was ironic that Shruti found herself accepting the entirety of her feelings for her beloved on the very day she heard of his death. How?! Her mind raved How could he die? How would she hide this sorrow? How would she love anyone again? She let her tears free only in the privacy of her own chambers. Her mind was filled with images of him. Handsome Arjuna, whose smiles made her heart beat faster, kind Arjuna never quite comfortable with people bowing to him, God like Arjuna who plucked the strings of the Veena as easily as he plucked the strings of his bow. Arjuna, Arjuna, Arjuna….. Karna. The man her father had chosen for her. Months had passed since the terrible day and Hastinapura had moved on. Duryodhan had established himself as the crown prince. Dushala had married Jayadratha, the king of Sindhu and one of Duryodhan's close friends. It was the right time for Shruti to be married too. And who better than one of the closest friends of the crown prince himself? He may be a Suta and already married. He may be a bit too old for her but he was a king! When Vasusena Karna's father had approached them for her hand, her parents could scarcely refuse. And why would they? He was undeniably wealthy and a warrior king of note. Moreover he was also Duryodhan's closest friend right from their days in Drona’s ashram. The crown prince had proffered the kingdom of Anga on him the day he had challenged Arjuna in the arms exhibition. Though Shruti didn’t know him well, Karna was not exactly a stranger to her. She had seen him with Duryodhana sometimes though she had taken no particular note of him and neither had he ever shown any interest in her. She had only felt a tinge of annoyance for him on the day of the exhibition but had quickly forgotten about him. Never in her wildest dreams had she ever imagined to find herself marrying the man who had sworn to kill her beloved. 

“He was never the one for you.” Her mother said. They were alone in her bed chamber, moments before her departure. “Even if he had been alive you couldn’t have married him. He was a Kshatriya prince and you are a Vaishya's daughter.” Shruti couldn’t believe her ears, had her mother always known? “What kind of a mother would I be if I didn’t know my daughter’s heart? It is good that the Prince is dead.” Shruti looked at her mother, aghast. “My words may sound cruel, Putri and may the Gods forgive me for them, but at least his death means that he shall never be in your sight. He is dead and you have a life ahead. Promise me that you shall try your best to make it a happy one.” Her mother had enveloped her in a hug then and Shruti had sobbed like a child. But afterwards as she sat beside her new husband in the carriage she had resolved to keep her promise. And she had. Her in laws were simple and honest people. Her husband was a dutiful man and even her co wife was sweet and accepting. Her husband never hindered any of her pursuits and Shruti was content with her poetry and music. He loved to hear her sing her compositions imagining them to be about him. Shruti would try her best to not let her guilt show. He couldn’t know that she was keeping his mortal enemy alive through her songs. This may not have been a life she had envisioned but it was enough. Shruti believed that one day the name Arjuna would cease to have any effect on her, one day she would think of him as nothing but a child's dream. But then the day of the Swayamvara had dawned. Duryodhan had asked her husband to accompany him and Karna had acquiesced. Shruti knew she was supposed to feel some concern, some jealousy, her husband was going to attend a Swayamvara! Yet she felt nothing as she made him farewell. All had been quiet for a few days and then the news had come. The news that had upturned her peaceful world.

**Author's Note:**

> In the Indonesian Mahabharata, Shalya has a daughter names Dewi Shutikanti who desired Arjuna but married Karna. Many stories have been written about Arjuna's wife desiring his enemy, this is just an attempt to write the reverse.


End file.
